The Gaslight Diaries

Why Couldn't I See It The Whole Time?

They say you can’t see the forest for the trees. For years, Lela catered to the trees, missing the bigger picture. What she thought was a business partnership—and even a deep romantic connection—turned out to be nothing more than a mirage.
Forced into what she calls a “lavender relationship,” Lela unpacks how manipulation disguised itself as love, how commitment felt transactional, and how affection was reserved for the highest bidder. This episode exposes the heartbreak of being tricked into believing love was real, when in reality it was conditional, manipulative, and self-serving.
Through raw reflection and girlfriend wisdom, Lela reveals the truth: not every rainbow has a pot of gold—and not every love story is worth holding on to.
👉🏾 Trigger Warning: Emotional abuse, manipulation, toxic relationships, explicit language.
Thanks for tuning in to today’s episode of The Gaslight Diaries. If this conversation hit home for you, don’t forget to subscribe, share, and leave a review your support helps this show reach more people who need it. For more tools to help you heal, glow up, and create your own soft life, check out my Grow Up to Glow Up Manual along with other books, journals, and resources available now in my online store. 👉🏾 Shop Books & Products Here: www.luxelifebylela.com👉🏾 Follow My Art & Lifestyle Brand: www.lelalovelee.com👉🏾 Connect with Me on TikTok & Instagram: @TheArtistLela @lelaluvlee Every purchase goes right back into supporting this podcast and empowering women like you to rebuild, reclaim, and rise. "Until next time, protect your peace, honor your glow, and remember, you deserve a life without struggle

Girlfriend Talk: The advice I Needed to Hear

Some friendships don’t last forever, but the lessons do. In this episode, Lela opens up to a very close girlfriend she hasn’t spoken to in years a bond that ended after drama boiled over into both of their lives. Though they had to separate, this friend’s words of wisdom still echo. From the first day to the last, her advice was always raw, real, and to the point so powerful that it shaped Lela’s perspective for years to come.
This isn’t about regret, but gratitude. Gratitude for the kind of friendship that tells you what you need to hear, not what you want to hear. Gratitude for the love that remains, even through silence.
👉🏾 Trigger Warning: Emotional conversation on lost friendships, explicit language.
Thanks for tuning in to today’s episode of The Gaslight Diaries. If this conversation hit home for you, don’t forget to subscribe, share, and leave a review your support helps this show reach more people who need it. For more tools to help you heal, glow up, and create your own soft life, check out my Grow Up to Glow Up Manual along with other books, journals, and resources available now in my online store. 👉🏾 Shop Books & Products Here: www.luxelifebylela.com👉🏾 Follow My Art & Lifestyle Brand: www.lelalovelee.com👉🏾 Connect with Me on TikTok & Instagram: @TheArtistLela @lelaluvlee Every purchase goes right back into supporting this podcast and empowering women like you to rebuild, reclaim, and rise. "Until next time, protect your peace, honor your glow, and remember, you deserve a life without struggle

Girlfriend talk: What Would You Do For Clout?

They call it attention-seeking. Lela calls it building her empire. In this episode, the girlfriends dive into the fine line between chasing clout and chasing purpose. What does it really mean when people accuse ambitious women of “just wanting attention”? And how can we use that energy to fuel manifestation, big moves, and soft life goals?
This isn’t just tea it’s strategy. The conversation flips judgment into empowerment, reminding listeners that visibility is part of success, and intention separates clout from clout-chasing.
No matter how chaotic life got, Lela kept hustling. From side gigs to passion projects, she tried to weave it all together always grinding, always building, always finding ways to create income streams. And in the spirit of trying to lift others up, she even put John on with business opportunities.
But what happens when your ambition and effort keep colliding with someone else’s irresponsibility? In this episode, the girlfriends unpack what it’s like to hustle nonstop, hold down multiple streams, and still feel weighed down by someone who refuses to pull their weight.
👉🏾 Trigger Warning: Manipulation, burnout, Explicit language, real talk on ambition, identity, and business.
Thanks for tuning in to today’s episode of The Gaslight Diaries. If this conversation hit home for you, don’t forget to subscribe, share, and leave a review your support helps this show reach more people who need it. For more tools to help you heal, glow up, and create your own soft life, check out my Grow Up to Glow Up Manual along with other books, journals, and resources available now in my online store. 👉🏾 Shop Books & Products Here: www.luxelifebylela.com👉🏾 Follow My Art & Lifestyle Brand: www.lelalovelee.com👉🏾 Connect with Me on TikTok & Instagram: @TheArtistLela @lelaluvlee Every purchase goes right back into supporting this podcast and empowering women like you to rebuild, reclaim, and rise. "Until next time, protect your peace, honor your glow, and remember, you deserve a life without struggle

Girlfriend Talk:Tried to have a One Night Stand to no prevail

Sometimes the glow-up comes with messy chapters, and this one’s all about the attempted one-night stand that didn’t go as planned. In this unfiltered conversation, Lela and her girlfriends spill the tea on situationships, late-night “what was I thinking” moments, and the wild ways men fumble.
Explicit, hilarious, and honey-dripped with truth, this episode is girl talk at its finest full of laughter, lessons, and a whole lot of side-eye. Pull up your wine glass, sis, because this tea is hot, spicy, and unforgettable.
👉🏾 Trigger Warning: Explicit sexual content, strong language, mature themes.
Thanks for tuning in to today’s episode of The Gaslight Diaries. If this conversation hit home for you, don’t forget to subscribe, share, and leave a review your support helps this show reach more people who need it. For more tools to help you heal, glow up, and create your own soft life, check out my Grow Up to Glow Up Manual along with other books, journals, and resources available now in my online store. 👉🏾 Shop Books & Products Here: www.luxelifebylela.com👉🏾 Follow My Art & Lifestyle Brand: www.lelalovelee.com👉🏾 Connect with Me on TikTok & Instagram: @TheArtistLela @lelaluvlee Every purchase goes right back into supporting this podcast and empowering women like you to rebuild, reclaim, and rise. "Until next time, protect your peace, honor your glow, and remember, you deserve a life without struggle

Girlfriend Talk: I Been Searching For A Real one

Looking back, Lela reflects on years of searching for love real love, without conditions, without manipulation, without being pimped out or used. From 2008–2011, she tried to make something real with John. From 2011–2018, she searched for a partner who was ready for commitment. One of her deepest connections was with a club security guard she met while working to make ends meet intense but short-lived, because he wasn’t commitment ready.
Through girl talk and heart-to-heart convos with her girlfriends, Lela begins to see the patterns, the red flags, and the lessons. And then came Steve the first man to open his heart and his home, showing her what a glimpse of a soft life could look like.
Explicitly honest, tender, and full of revelations, this episode is a love story told through pain, growth, and hope.
👉🏾 Trigger Warning: Emotional abuse, relationship trauma, explicit language.
Thanks for tuning in to today’s episode of The Gaslight Diaries. If this conversation hit home for you, don’t forget to subscribe, share, and leave a review your support helps this show reach more people who need it. For more tools to help you heal, glow up, and create your own soft life, check out my Grow Up to Glow Up Manual along with other books, journals, and resources available now in my online store. 👉🏾 Shop Books & Products Here: www.luxelifebylela.com👉🏾 Follow My Art & Lifestyle Brand: www.lelalovelee.com👉🏾 Connect with Me on TikTok & Instagram: @TheArtistLela @lelaluvlee Every purchase goes right back into supporting this podcast and empowering women like you to rebuild, reclaim, and rise. "Until next time, protect your peace, honor your glow, and remember, you deserve a life without struggle

Don't Sprinkle weed at me and run, I rather go smoke crack

What do you do when someone’s first instinct isn’t honesty, but control when even friendship, being cordial, or cohabitation gets twisted into manipulation? In this episode, Lela reveals how John weaponizes drugs, sprinkling them into situations as leverage, holding “being cool” or “being roommates” as power plays.
What should have been recreational use of marijuana becomes another manipulative tool—his way of keeping the upper hand, forcing control, and blurring boundaries. Instead of partnership, it’s a setup. Instead of trust, it’s entrapment.
Listeners will hear firsthand how drug abuse becomes more than self-destruction it becomes a form of manipulation, and how Lela resists being trapped in yet another cycle of control.
👉🏾 Trigger Warning: Drug misuse, manipulation, toxic relationships, explicit language.
Thanks for tuning in to today’s episode of The Gaslight Diaries. If this conversation hit home for you, don’t forget to subscribe, share, and leave a review your support helps this show reach more people who need it. For more tools to help you heal, glow up, and create your own soft life, check out my Grow Up to Glow Up Manual along with other books, journals, and resources available now in my online store. 👉🏾 Shop Books & Products Here: www.luxelifebylela.com👉🏾 Follow My Art & Lifestyle Brand: www.lelalovelee.com👉🏾 Connect with Me on TikTok & Instagram: @TheArtistLela @lelaluvlee Every purchase goes right back into supporting this podcast and empowering women like you to rebuild, reclaim, and rise. "Until next time, protect your peace, honor your glow, and remember, you deserve a life without struggle

The Girlfriend Chronicles: Get me off this Fucking Ledge

“New season, new energy. After surviving the manipulation, the gaslighting, the chaos—you know the story—I’m reconnecting with the women who keep me grounded. Season 2 of the podcast is all about the Girlfriends Chronicles: raw, honest conversations with my girls, the ones who talk me off the ledge, help me see through the madness, and remind me who I really am.
This season, we’re diving deep into what it means to rebuild after toxic partnerships, reclaim our power, and redefine our lives. From friendship and healing to finances and soft life goals, these episodes are real talk, no filter. Because sometimes, it’s your circle that saves you.”
👉🏾 Trigger Warning: Still some raw conversation about manipulation, abuse, and healing, but with a new lens of sisterhood and growth
Thanks for tuning in to today’s episode of The Gaslight Diaries. If this conversation hit home for you, don’t forget to subscribe, share, and leave a review your support helps this show reach more people who need it. For more tools to help you heal, glow up, and create your own soft life, check out my Grow Up to Glow Up Manual along with other books, journals, and resources available now in my online store. 👉🏾 Shop Books & Products Here: www.luxelifebylela.com👉🏾 Follow My Art & Lifestyle Brand: www.lelalovelee.com👉🏾 Connect with Me on TikTok & Instagram: @TheArtistLela @lelaluvlee Every purchase goes right back into supporting this podcast and empowering women like you to rebuild, reclaim, and rise. "Until next time, protect your peace, honor your glow, and remember, you deserve a life without struggle

In the potential of an Accident: Rage on the Road

What happens when someone’s first instinct—no matter the circumstance—is to rage, deflect, and complain? In this episode, Lela shares how even the potential of an accident spirals into chaos with John, whose normal response to anyone or anything is total defensiveness.
Conversations feel like trying to talk a toddler off a rooftop: exhausting, overwhelming, and never-ending. The constant cycle of rage and resistance leaves no room for growth, no room for accountability, and no room for peace. This episode peels back the layers of what it means to work with someone defensive by default—and how that toxicity bleeds into every part of life.
👉🏾 Trigger Warning: Rage responses, gaslighting, emotional manipulation, explicit language.
Thanks for tuning in to today’s episode of The Gaslight Diaries. If this conversation hit home for you, don’t forget to subscribe, share, and leave a review your support helps this show reach more people who need it. For more tools to help you heal, glow up, and create your own soft life, check out my Grow Up to Glow Up Manual along with other books, journals, and resources available now in my online store. 👉🏾 Shop Books & Products Here: www.luxelifebylela.com👉🏾 Follow My Art & Lifestyle Brand: www.lelalovelee.com👉🏾 Connect with Me on TikTok & Instagram: @TheArtistLela @lelaluvlee Every purchase goes right back into supporting this podcast and empowering women like you to rebuild, reclaim, and rise. "Until next time, protect your peace, honor your glow, and remember, you deserve a life without struggle

Trying to escape the Drama of this Prison

As Lela finally steps into something new a long-distance relationship full of hope and healing John does everything in his power to sabotage it. From manipulating her schedule to draining her energy, his mission is clear: wedge himself between Lela and her chance at happiness.
What should be a season of soft life and new beginnings turns into another battleground. With every phone call, every fight, and every demand for her time, John proves that his need for control isn’t limited to business it’s personal.
👉🏾 Trigger Warning: Gaslighting, jealousy, emotional manipulation.
Thanks for tuning in to today’s episode of The Gaslight Diaries. If this conversation hit home for you, don’t forget to subscribe, share, and leave a review your support helps this show reach more people who need it. For more tools to help you heal, glow up, and create your own soft life, check out my Grow Up to Glow Up Manual along with other books, journals, and resources available now in my online store. 👉🏾 Shop Books & Products Here: www.luxelifebylela.com👉🏾 Follow My Art & Lifestyle Brand: www.lelalovelee.com👉🏾 Connect with Me on TikTok & Instagram: @TheArtistLela @lelaluvlee Every purchase goes right back into supporting this podcast and empowering women like you to rebuild, reclaim, and rise. "Until next time, protect your peace, honor your glow, and remember, you deserve a life without struggle

Let's Walk on Eggshells for the Fragile Chicken Bully

There’s a fragile, volatile energy that makes every day a minefield. In this episode, Lela reveals the constant stress of walking on eggshells around a “manager” who screams instead of apologizing, misinterprets everything, and refuses accountability for years of reckless spending.
Beyond exhausting, this behavior isn’t just emotional it jeopardizes the business. With no receipts, records, or accountability, every conversation turns into a rewind of facts, arguments, and frustration. Listeners get a raw, unfiltered view of what it’s like to manage a manipulator while fighting to protect a business, sanity, and personal life.
👉🏾 Trigger Warning: Gaslighting, workplace bullying, financial manipulation, emotional abuse, explicit language
Thanks for tuning in to today’s episode of The Gaslight Diaries. If this conversation hit home for you, don’t forget to subscribe, share, and leave a review your support helps this show reach more people who need it. For more tools to help you heal, glow up, and create your own soft life, check out my Grow Up to Glow Up Manual along with other books, journals, and resources available now in my online store. 👉🏾 Shop Books & Products Here: www.luxelifebylela.com👉🏾 Follow My Art & Lifestyle Brand: www.lelalovelee.com👉🏾 Connect with Me on TikTok & Instagram: @TheArtistLela @lelaluvlee Every purchase goes right back into supporting this podcast and empowering women like you to rebuild, reclaim, and rise. "Until next time, protect your peace, honor your glow, and remember, you deserve a life without struggle